Old Hippies Never Die. They Just Get Chlamydia


It seems that geezers are ahead of the curve for increased rates of syphilis and chlamydia. From the LA Times:

In the five years from 2005 to 2009, the number of reported cases of syphilis and chlamydia among those 55 and older increased 43 percent, according to an Orlando Sentinel analysis of data provided by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

In Central Florida, the rise is even more dramatic. Among those 55 and older, the reported cases of syphilis and chlamydia increased 71 percent in that same five-year period. That puts Central Florida ahead of the state, which saw a 62 percent rise in those two sexually transmitted infections among the same age group.

Oh dear. My mind’s eye is cowering. The Villages really is one of America’s “friendliest” home towns. Friendliest with benefits, evidently.

One of the reasons for the slatternly ways of our elderly?

“The flower children who were in their 20s back in the 1960s are now in their 70s,” said Salagubang. “They’re the make-love-not-war generation, and old habits die hard.”

AHA! We really can blame the darn hippies for nearly everything! Medicare and Medicaid are now discussing covering screenings for STDs for these aging – and aged – hippies.

So now if you punch a hippie, as we are all wont to do, it is actually a public service. You may just prevent him from passing along chlamydia. And it’s fiscally responsible, too, now that STD screenings may be covered. Not to mention the cost of all that Valtrex!

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2 Responses to Old Hippies Never Die. They Just Get Chlamydia

  1. CO2 Insanity says:

    I blame it on Viagra.

  2. Gold Star for Robot Boy says:

    Hippies in The Villages? Hardly – that’s hardcore red country.
    A Bush rally in 2004 drew thousands, and he still packs ’em in there: http://articles.orlandosentinel.com/2010-11-13/news/os-villages-president-george-w-bush-20101114_1_george-w-bush-barbara-bush-decision-points

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